Christmas Story #4 - circa 1976

I was working at the magazine, receiving ad materials (what advertisers -- in those days -- mailed to the magazine so the magazine could print their ad; now it's all done via email). There was an advertiser who shall remain nameless that was running a page and a postcard which the magazine was printing. I always looked over the ad materials and often caught a typo or a mistake -- and advertisers were very grateful if I'd catch something in time to fix it. Anyway, I found a major mistake in the materials this ad agency provided. I phoned the agency guy and alerted him, and there was time to change it. I can't remember what the mistake was, but the postcard would have been printed wrong and they would have had to eat the expense for reprinting it.

He told me he was so grateful that he was going to send me a present -- and it was the run up to Christmas too. I was a low-level person at the time (oh wait, I still am). The thought of a gift from a New York ad agency had sugarplums dancing in my head. Tiffany? A gift certificate? Leather bag?

The present arrived via UPS and since I wasn't home -- I thought it was a good sign he had sent it to my home -- I had to traipse over to the UPS warehouse on 12th Avenue...after work. Ok, nobody goes to 12th Avenue except trans-sexual hookers -- I picked up my package.

Inside was the cheapest piece of crap I've yet to see -- like something you'd see in a dollar store -- it was a clear plastic doll about 12 inches high with a blue and white checked dress on it. Inside the doll was cheap ass hard candy. So it was a plastic doll cum candy container. Around the neck of the doll was a tag labeling her as "Little Miss Gingham Goodie."

I confided to my friend Stancie, then my coworker, about my disappointment, and somehow this name -- Little Miss Gingham Goodie survived. I can't even tell you how we use it -- like if someone is uptight, we call her "Little Miss Gingham Goodie" or we compare other presents to "Little Miss Gingham Goodie." How's your Christmas shopping? Get your Little Miss Gingham Goodie yet? I'll call her and say hello and she'll say, "Is this Little Miss Gingham Goodie?" It's all-purpose; it's our term, and it's our joke. So if you ever see Stancie, go ahead and call her Little Miss Gingham Goodie.

No doubt Little Miss Gingham  Goodie -- I think we just enjoy saying it -- was a great gift after all since it still amuses us after 35 years.